The Best and the Worst Thing
by Verity52
Summary: Following The Vampire Diaries canon from Damon's point of view.


Author's Note: I find Damon to be the most interesting character and want to explore his thoughts and actions against the backdrop of information we know now. Please leave a review if I make any canon mistakes that you notice – I'm interested in keeping this accurate!

[Line]

I wonder if Stefan, too, feels the push. It is dark and deep, but there. A siren's call to home, as though our mother is calling to us like little children. But we are boys no longer.

I know Stefan. I've tracked him across this wretched country, through small towns and large cities, through passing decades, and people's lifetimes. This is another one of his vampire 'check-ins,' I'm certain. Make a diary deposit, mourn about his few human years that border on nothing in comparison to the length of his undead life, give a little "hey, how you doin'?" to whatever miserable 'family' member has the strangling duty of keeping the house and our secret.

Then off into the world again. A life synonymous with suffering and self-denial. Or mass murder, depending on if he's taken a tumble off the little red wagon. But that never lasts long - Lexi always flies in to save his ass, never bothering to address his real problems. But that's ever the Stefan way – he's either in control or out of it. Personal growth through extremes.

God, only Stefan could make being immortal so… boring. Unlike him, I'd learned to keep things interesting long ago. Or at least how to fool myself into thinking I had.

I watch from the forest as Stefan enters the boarding house, listening to his reassurances to a shaking 'Uncle' Zach. "I need some time to take care of things. I won't be here long. And I'll remain inconspicuous," he promises.

Oh, dear brother. That makes one of us.

[Line]

I take to lying in the road, waiting for dinner. There are easier ways to acquire fresh blood, but, well, everything is easy for a vampire. Interesting and amusing are harder to come by. Besides, if I let dear brother know that I am not far behind, he'll bust out of town quickly, fearful of the damage that I might cause. And then I can remain and let things unfold.

150 years. I hadn't imagined that I would have to wait so long. Emily certainly failed to mention _that_ in our little deal. Protect my lineage and I'll save Katherine, she says. No mention of the 150 years of subtle Bennett stalking I had to put in before ever seeing the payoff.

I wouldn't have cared, though, and I suppose she knew that. I would give anything to Katherine. I would spend another 150 years waiting, if I had to.

But I won't – I will free her.

I dream of her. It's difficult not to, being back in the town where our second lives began, where two brothers lost everything: their lives… their brotherhood… the girl. The memory of her never fades. She is the forever bright picture in my mind and soon, it will be her flesh that I touch rather than recall.

I can hear a human approaching. The steps are soft, certainly a girl. I'm envisioning the feed and Stefan's panic when I hear _her, _the very object of my prior thoughts.

"I know, Bonnie, you're right."

I turn my head. Katherine's voice. It can't be. But the voice goes on and I see Katherine. She has a cell phone against her ear, and she's still speaking into it. "You and my mom both are… I just can't bring myself to tell him… at least not tonight. I'll call you later."

She pulls the phone away from her ear, eyes down. I'm in front of her in an instant. How can she be here? How can she be free when I've spent the 150 years waiting to do it?

"Katherine." I want to touch her, ensure she's real and not some planted dream or hallucination.

But she looks up from the device and is clearly unnerved by my sudden appearance. Brown eyes stare at me, but not in a way that suggest she knows my face. This girl looks at me as though she does not know me at all.

Because she doesn't. "Um, no. I—" The girl glances behind her, but there is no one there that I could be addressing. "I'm Elena," she says uncertainly.

It's not possible. The face, her eyes, her hair… this is Katherine in every physical aspect. Yet I have to accept that it must be – Katherine could never have held herself so unsurely, like such a normal, typical thing. Katherine didn't know this kind of insecurity, this hapless humanity.

This is not Katherine.

"Oh, you…" I shake my head, struggling to control the rushing emotions from passing on my face. I let out a sigh. "You just look…" I stop myself. I can hear the shift in her heartbeat. I'm making her nervous and afraid. I start to move closer and speak to reassure her.

"I'm sorry… you just really remind me of someone." I purse my lips. "I'm Damon."

She does not look as relieved as I expected at the introduction. "Not to be rude or anything, Damon, but it's kind of creepy that you're out here in the middle of nowhere."

There is a mild accusation in her voice, and I seek to discourage it. "You're one to talk. You're out here all by yourself."

She gestures with her hands, a shrug. "It's Mystic Falls. Nothing bad ever happens here."

I nod unthinkingly, still staring at her. The irony of the statement gives me pause. I could beg to differ, but Jesus. What _are_ they teaching children these days? They need a new history teacher, _badly,_ if the little ones are growing up with no fear of things that go bump in the night.

She makes a strange grimace and then glances down at her cell phone. She raises it and lets it drop again, and says, "Got into a fight with my boyfriend," by way of explanation for her lack of company.

"About what?" I say, before I can consider the rudeness. I quickly add," May I ask?" and throw my hands up in a gesture signifying no ill intent.

She looks down again, shaking her head, and sighs. "Life, future… he's got it _all _mapped out."

I understand what has brought her out to the road all alone now. The need for quiet, the need for solace… the desire to escape. "You don't want it?" I ask.

She shrugs again. "I don't know what I want."

"Well, that's not true. You want what everybody wants."

She tips her head, starting to smile, sensing the game afoot. "What, mysterious stranger who has all the answers?

"Hm." I can't help but smirk. It's pleasing to flirt with this human. "Well, let's just say I've been around for a long time. I've learned a few things."

"So, Damon, tell me. What is it that I want?"

She is still playing, but suddenly I'm not. I know what she wants, and I want her to hear it, to know that it's okay to want it. I'm not often moved to guide any human in any sort of way except to my fangs, but her resemblance to Katherine endears her to me. Poor Katherine has suffered for so long in the tomb – maybe there is a sense of rightness in the world if Elena gets more than the ordinary that is attempting to wrap itself around her.

I move in closer, aware that each step brings me closer to the light perfume that her skin emits, to her beating heart, to her pulsing blood. "You want a love that consumes you. You want passion, an adventure, and even a little danger." I smile.

Her expression clouds, and I know I've put words to feelings in her heart, ones she hasn't even begin to acknowledge. She scrambles to be back in the game, where she doesn't have to examine the contents of her heart. "So, what do you want?" she asks, attempting to be coy.

But underneath, she's asking me if I want those things, too. Searching for someone to identify with.

I do want those things. But for the first time in a long time, I question whether or not I want those things with Katherine, and it unsettles me to realize it. How could someone who looks so much like Katherine make me question what I've felt for a century and more? I let out a sigh and pin my eyes on her.

The car that has been approaching for the last half mile honks, and Elena turns. It comes into view, and she shifts on her feet. "It's my parents," she says. I am surprised at the small flutter I feel at her displeasure at their disruption to our conversation.

She turns to me again, and I'm inches away from her, catching her in my eyes.

I tell her the truth. "I want you to get everything that you're looking for, but right now, I want you to forget that this happened." I smile. "Can't have people know I'm in town yet."

I stare at her face. There's no need to memorize – it's a face that I've loved for a hundred and fifty years. But I just want one more moment to see it. There are months to go before I can release Katherine, and more than a few things that still need to fall into place.

"Goodbye, Elena."


End file.
